897: Trusting in God

One of the best advices the older women from our church gave me was to give my life to God and seek Him, because only then, that everything I need will be given to me. It’s not that hard to obey once you realize that doing the right thing won’t cause any harm and doing the right thing will benefit everyone. Sometimes, it can be hard to choose but you can never go wrong with obeying God. Obeying God means making a lot of sacrifices. I’ve cried several times trying to do the right thing because it would mean that I will not choose the option that I want, but insted choose what God wants. I had to reject a lot of people or to slowly disappear so there won’t be any painful goodbyes.

If you would ask me, some guys are perfect, except for the fact that they love themselves more than God. For me, that’s the number one thing I’d check on; if he does everything to please God, and not himself. It’s easy to love anyone, but not everyone can love you right especially if they’re living their life without God.

As perfect as a person can seem, and as much as I like him all the same, God makes plot twists so we can’t be together. Like, suddenly he’s gone or suddenly he likes someone else the moment I start liking him. And then I question God ‘Why?’

Maybe it’s God’s way of protecting me from being tied to the wrong person or diverting me according to His plan for my life. I just simply just have to trust Him. I remembered that I decided to give my all the pieces of my life and my heart to Him, so that He would rearrange it, mend it and take care of it. That was my prayer. He’s doing just that, taking care of me. He’s doing a lot of rearranging and sudden turning of events in my life that He won’t just let me make stupid decisions to ruin myself. He’s that protective and He loves me that much.

I love you Father/God. He is the King of kings and the King of my heart. I am His daughter. I will do everything I can to represent His love to this fallen world that desparately needs it. I’m doing my best and I hope I can do more.

899 days to MD: day before Midterms

Studying out, particularly at coffee shops, makes me more productive. I cant concentrate much at home.
Having a chat with a friend made me realize something: never be too attached to people so you wont have too deal with heartaches when missing them. But of course that’s not me. I do get attached with people I start to love and I do miss all my friends (and it doesn’t matter if they miss me or not)

I need to catch on some sleep but I still need to read. I feel like I’m a robot. Taking in all the information, not understanding anything. The struggle is real. That overwhelming feeling of reading a lot of info, but not being able to retain it. I have yet to master the art of studying Medicine.

Any advice on how to memorize and absorb information faster? Let me know.